The Siths of Our Lives

In Which They Get Ready To Rumble

Kage and Hannik woke up in holding cells, their gear having been stripped from them. About a minute later, a man clad in a wide brimmed hat and brown leather duster entered. He introduced himself as Vance, the ruler of this planet (which he’d also named Vance). Vance ran a salvage operation, luring ships to the supposedly uninhabited planet where they would crash. He then had the ships stripped for parts and sold any surviving crew as slaves. The planet was also unique in that it strongly suppressed the use of Force powers, leaving all but the most powerful Sith and Jedi helpless.

Vance explained that due to their murder of the Twi’lek family, the pair were now considered criminals on the planet. Vance explained that while he didn’t personally care much about them killing the family, the laborers were in an uproar and he needed to appease them so they’d get back to work.

The punishment for their crime was that they would be entered in a local competition, where they would face off against various beasts and other prisoners. If they survived all four rounds, they would be released and allowed to leave the planet. Their gear would be returned to them before the fighting began. In addition, Vance would grant them each one boon to help them.

Hannik, concerned regarding his ability to aim with his injured eye, requested it be healed. Kage shrewdly requested several of the darts that had been used to incapacitate him and Hannik.

The first round began. Kage and Hannik were released into the arena, along with two frightened looking peasants and a flock of shyracks. Hannik decided to go kill the peasants, while Kage easily took down the shyracks. The next round, a female peasant was released, as well as two men that Hannik recognized as dressed in Imperial uniform. As the round began, the female peasant slipped out of sight before Kage or Hannik could try to kill them. Hannik spoke with the Imperials and discovered they were survivors from the missing Imperial vessels, a trooper and a Sith warrior named Darth Malictus. Malictus and Hannik made a deal to work together in the arena. However, after the third round Kage began insulting Malictus. The arrogant Sith, infuriated at being insulted by someone he viewed as his lesser, attacked Kage and knocked him unconscious. Hannik stood by, not wanting to get involved. Malictus sliced off Kage’s right hand with his lightsaber and left Kage to be revived by Hannik.

In the next round, Kage had a plan. While Hannik and Malictus enganged the rancor, Kage carefully lined up a shot. He hit the unsuspecting Malictus cleanly, nearly taking him down. Malictus’s trooper cohort quickly applied a medkit to the warrior, who disengaged from the rancor and came after Kage. Hannik was unable to deal with the gigantic beast on his own and was quickly knocked unconscious. The rancor came after Malictus, forcing the warrior to deal with the rancor while Kage continued to shoot at him.

As Hannik lay on the verge of death, the peasant who had been hiding approached him. She seemed conflicted, but eventually made up her mind and used the Force to heal his wounds. The Jedi quickly slipped away again before anyone could see her.

Darth Malictus finished off the rancor and closed to melee with Kage. Although the Mandalorian fought fiercely and nearly killed the Sith, he was unable to defeat Malictus and was knocked unconscious. Hannik got up and ran over to where they were fighting just as the warrior raised his saber to strike the killing blow.

Hannik saw the opening in Malictus’s defenses and struck, knocking the warrior unconscious with a perfect hit. With his boss unconscious, the trooper surrendered, stammering apologies and pleading for his life. Hannik revived Kage, who shot off both of the Sith warrior’s hands and claimed his lightsaber for himself.

Vance came down into the arena to congratulate Kage and Hannik. Although Hannik’s ship had already been stripped for parts, Vance agreed to provide another ship for them to leave on. He also told them that Nyx was with him and agreed to let her leave with them.

The three took off for Korriban, to receive their rewards and get Kage fitted for a replacement hand.

In Which The Party Splits A Bit

Back on Korriban, Hannik reported what he’d learned to Darth Dremenis and had the young Twi’lek taken into custody. Since Nyx was still missing, Dremenis asked Hannik and Kage to return to the planet and try to find her. However, Hannik ditched Kage and flew off by himself, on account of the fact that “he is just…so…STUPID.”

Kage started on his typical hooker killing spree, which didn’t sit to well with the local authorities. Sixteen soldiers cornered Kage in an alleyway, and although he managed to take down several he was eventually captured.

Kage woke up in a holding cell, where he was confronted by the furious Darth Dremenis. The Sith Lord explained that the only reason Kage wasn’t executed was because Nyx had taken him as her bodyguard. He then sent Kage off in a one way shuttle to the desert planet to meet up with Hannik.

Hannik had some trouble landing, but eventually landed in a canyon, where he could see a small village in the distance. He also noticed Kage’s shuttle crash land nearby. As the two met up and made plans, a swoop bike started approaching from the direction of the village. Looking through the scope of his sniper rifle, Kage saw that a male Twi’lek and his wife and son were riding on the swoop bike, with no obvious weapons.

When the family got close enough, Hannik unleashed a barrage of Force Lightning, causing the Twi’lek to lose control of his swoop and crash into the wreckage of Kage’s shuttle. Hannik dragged the father to his feet, intending to talk to him. However, the terrified Twi’lek pulled out a hidden knife and slashed at Hannik.

Enraged, Hannik slammed the father into the side of the shuttle. The injured Twi’lek could only watch as Hannik ignited his lightsaber and sliced apart the wife and son. With the last of his strength, the father pulled out a concealed grenade and detonated it right on top of all of them.

The explosion killed the father instantly, and severely injured Kage and Hannik. Kage tried to treat Hannik’s injuries, but managed to jab him in the eye with a needle, partially blinding him.

The two retreated to the ship, planning to use its weapons to bomb the nearby village. But before Hannik could start up the ship, a dart came seemingly out of nowhere and lodged itself in his neck. Hannik didn’t even have time to draw a weapon before the powerful toxin knocked him unconscious. A second one hit Kage, but the hardy Mandalorian managed to remain standing. He made his best guess as to where the cloaked attackers where and let loose with a barrage of blaster fire, but didn’t manage to hit any of them. A second dart hit him and he went down.

In Which Hannik Goes Off The Deep End

After collecting their bounty reward, Kage and Nyx returned to their stolen ship and discovered that Imperial intelligence had turned up information on where Hannik might have gone. They followed his trail to a small unknown planet that contained an ancient Sith temple. Here they found Hannik, who was apparently Force Sensitive and had been completely corrupted by the Dark Side energies in the temple. Suspecting this was why her master had ordered her to keep an eye on Hannik, Nyx offered to escort Hannik back to Korriban.

On Korriban, Hannik and Kage were provided with luxurious lodgings (well, Hannik’s were at least), while Nyx left them to meet with her master.

A few days later, Hannik and Kage received requests to meet with Nyx’s master, Darth Dremenis. He explained that Nyx had been sent to investigate the disappearance of two Imperial vessels near an uninhabited planet. She had not reported back in twelve hours, and Dremenis suspected whatever had happened to the Imperial ships had happened to her as well. He requested Kage and Hannik go and learn what had happened to her.

They took Hannik’s ship to the supposedly lifeless desert planet. As soon as they entered the atmosphere, the ship began to malfunction and sink. Despite his best efforts, Hannik was unable to regain control of the ship, and they crash landed on the planet’s surface.

After assessing the damage to the ship, Hannik determined they would need several parts to repair it and get it flying again. Fortunately, in the distance, several other crashed ships could be seen. As they approached the ships to scavenge them for parts, a bullet whizzed past Kage’s head. Hannik and Kage ducked behind the wreckage and tried to determine where the sniper was.

As Kage was calculating the sniper’s position, Hannik noticed his ship starting up. He started dashing toward it, using the Force to propel himself forward faster. The sniper continued to shoot at him now that he had to cover, grazing him with several bullets. Kage continued to watch and eventually determined where the sniper was stationed. He got in range and took the sniper out, leaving Hannik free to bolt into his already departing ship.

Suspecting there might be more than one sniper, Kage ducked inside one of the wrecked ships, planting mines around the entrance.

Hannik leaped into his ship just as it was starting to take off. A young Twi’lek girl at the controls whirled around in surprise. Hannik threw her away from the controls and discovered that whatever had caused his ship to crash was no longer effecting it for some reason. He pinned the young girl against the wall and demanded she explain was going on. The terrified girl stammered that someone named Vance had sent her to sneak onto the ship, enter the codes that would prevent the ship from being effected by the planet’s gravitational device, and bring the ship to his palace.

Meanwhile, Kage’s patience paid off as he heard his mines go off and a scream of pain. Kage quickly finished the sniper off, and claimed the man’s sniper rifle for himself. He returned to Hannik at the ship. Hannik decided it was time to return to Korriban to report back, and decided to bring the dismayed young Twi’lek with them.

In Which Shit Gets Blown Up

While pouring through Imperial intelligence reports to try to determine where Hannik had gone, Nyx came across an interesting bounty posting. The spirit of a Sith Lord was supposedly inhabiting a droid body, and had gained control of a ship with weapons powerful enough to destroy a planet. A large reward was offered for killing him and destroying his ship.

The ship was reported to be currently near Geonosis, so Kage and Nyx headed there. They investigated and learned how best to board the ship without being noticed, and gained command of a battalion of Sith troopers.

They managed to successfully board the ship, right as it used its weapons to destroy Geonosis. Nyx, Kage, and the troopers fought through an army of combat droids and eventually reached the former Sith Lord. After a fierce battle, Kage finished off the droid with grenade, destroying it. Nyx claimed the Sith Lord’s unique lightsaber for herself, while Kage acquired a powerful shotgun.

The troopers they’d left to guard the shuttle had been slaughtered by droids, but Nyx and Kage fought their way to the shuttle and escaped as the ship blew up.

In Which Nyx Gets Bitches

Hannik docked his ship far away from the main academy on Korriban so that they could approach stealthily. As they exited the ship, the party was ambushed by a large group of Wraids. One lunged at Hannik, quickly taking him down. Nyx leaped on top of the ship to assault the creatures with Force Lightning, while Kage backed into the ship to form a choke point. Between the two of them, they were able to kill all the creatures. Kage then revived Hannik with a medkit.

Hannik and Nyx left Kage to his own devices while the two of them snuck into the Sith Academy. Hannik disabled the security systems, allowing her to enter unnoticed. Hannik returned to the ship while Nyx met with her Sith master Darth Dremenis, explaining the she was not a traitor and had been set up. Her master believed her, and ordered her to keep watch on Hannik and Kage.

Nyx returned to Hannik’s ship. Having been delayed by a day already, Hannik immediately set off to deliver his cargo. When they landed, Nyx decided to go with Hannik, and Kage was once again left to his own devices.

Unfortunately, Kage’s devices involve following people into bathrooms and murdering them. This got him a bit of attention from the local law enforcement, who captured him and locked him up. But only an hour later, members of a local gang bizarrely named the Pink Pistols staged a breakout for some of their imprisoned members. In the process they captured Kage and brought him with them.

Nyx and Hannik returned from his meeting and discovered what had happened to Kage. Hannik wanted to leave Kage behind, citing him as more trouble than he was worth, but Nyx wanted to rescue him. Hannik returned to his ship and left the planet, while Nyx tracked down the gang that had taken Kage.

Once she located the Pink Pistols, Nyx intentionally got herself captured. Put in a cell next to Kage, the two came up with a plan. One at a time, Nyx seduced the guards into entering her cell. She and Kage would then kill them, and Kage would eat the bodies to remove most of the evidence.

The surviving gang members eventually noticed the smell and pile of bones in Kage’s cell, and brought the two of them before their Hutt leader. Nyx moved in close to the Hutt and then pulled out her concealed lightsabers sliced the Hutt in two. She then used the Force to try to persuade the remaining gang members that they should now work for her. About half agreed, and the other half were easily slaughtered by her and Kage.

Nyx renamed the gang “Nyx’s Bitches”, a name somehow less degrading than the gang’s previous name. She and Kage then returned to the starport, hijacked a ship, and forced the pilot to fly them off planet.

In Which Everyone Is Acquainted And Somehow None Of Them Kill Each Other

Our story began with each of our three “heroes” in a cantina on Taris, each there for their own reasons. The smuggler Hannik had cargo that needed to be moved off world, but was in need of reliable help. The Mandalorian Kage was seeking work, after being ejected from the military due to his psychotic nature. And the Sith apprentice Nyx was undercover and meeting with a Republic spy.

Kage approached the bartender to see if he knew anyone who was hiring, and was directed to Hannik. The smuggler had Kage go kill one of the patrons of the catina as a test of his abilities. Kage snapped the man’s neck and left a drink in his hand.

Meanwhile, Nyx convinced the spy to give her the datapad with the information she needed. Having acquired what she needed, the Sith ran him through with her lightsaber. She was just about to leave the cantina when a group of Republic soldiers entered.

Hannik saw the soldiers and, thinking they were there to arrest him, ordered Kage to do something about them. Kage set the cantina on fire. In the chaos and confusion, Kage, Hannik, and Nyx all managed to escape into the maintenance tunnels.

Hannik and Kage ended up getting separated, and Kage eventually ran into Nyx. Not knowing her way out of the tunnels, Nyx decided to go with the Mandalorian.

Nyx and Kage eventually found Hannik trapped in a stuck elevator (which Kage tried to fix by ripping off the control panel), and the three of them found their way to where Hannik had parked his swoop bike. He showed Nyx how to use his, and he and Kage stole another bike so they could ride back to Hannik’s ship.

However, as soon as they entered traffic, Nyx peeled off from them and went off on her own, stealing Hannik’s bike. She returned to her lodgings and made an unfortunate discovery. The spymaster who the man she’d killed had worked for was aware she was a Sith. He had managed to forge information that made it look like she was a traitor to the Empire.

With her accounts frozen and no other way to get off the planet, Nyx hurried to where Hannik’s ship was docked, barely making it on board before the ship took off. She found Hannik in the cockpit and revealed herself to be Sith, threatening Hannik with death if he did not take her to Korriban.

Hannik agreed to take her to Korriban, preventing a fight between her and Kage, who had shown up in the cockpit. Annoyed with Kage’s antics, Nyx Force Persuaded him to take some sedatives by claiming they were candy.


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